do you believe in soul mates?

Jeff and I were listening to Michael Medved, and sadly, eventually, we had to turn it off. Medved had on an author who wrote a book called “Marry Him”. The book was encouraging women to not overlook “regular” guys, and thus miss their soul mate. The woman who wrote the book is 43 and unmarried. She said she’d found someone really great, but due to some “family issues” he had to move away and so they weren’t together anymore. In my opinion, one should only give advice about what one knows. (Now I know in the past, I have given unwanted and unrequested advice, but it was on things I knew! 😉 ) I think I would rather read a book on marriage or on finding the right person by someone who has been successful at finding someone, getting married and staying married.
The problem is, marriage isn’t easy. One has to choose to love sometimes. One has to die to oneself sometimes … don’t get me wrong, being married is a lot of fun. Being married is a lot of work, too.
I think we’ve been inundated with Hollywood’s image of marriage, and we forget that it’s not easy. We think it should be smooth, simple and uncomplicated. This is silly thinking because people are complicated, rough, and usually fairly complex. Marriage brings two of these beings together, and causes them to live together, work together, entwine their lives with each other. Why should this be easy? Does it really matter if the two people are soul mates or not? You tell me.

Anyways … on a semi-related note –
Valentine’s Day always reminds me of what marriage is. Jeff asked me to marry him 15 years ago on Valentine’s Day. Since then, we’ve had quite a few different Valentine’s days – from dinner out to a picnic in the living room. This year, for Valentine’s Day we invited one of the boys’ friends over and hung out in the living room. I gave Jeff and the boys valentine cards, the boys gave us cards … that was the extent of our day. Granted, we weren’t feeling the greatest, as we were still getting over being sick, but that’s not really why we didn’t do anything. We honestly couldn’t think of anything to do! We didn’t want to see any of the movies that were out, we didn’t feel like eating out, and we didn’t want to spend the money on an overnight trip anywhere. I think we’ve become an old married couple!! (I kept thinking of Mr. Elton in “Pride & Prejudice” on Sunday!)