Learning Joy

Baby Max with his dad, Matthew; Grandpa Fetig & Grandpa DuCom  

Couldn’t resist — this was such a cute picture of Max! 

Baby Max & Debbie (his Grandma) just after Max was born. Now you will all know who Debbie is. ;o) 

Mandie Nicholas 

Shannen Nicholas 🙂 

My cousin Ruthie’s girls ~ Paige, Mandie & Shannen Nicholas 

Paige Nicholas 

Just a little update. I had a D&C scheduled this morning, but I won’t have to go. I miscarried yesterday. Jef & I thought that was weird. It had been five weeks since the baby had stopped living, and the day before I was to have the “procedure” (as they called it), I miscarry. I was relieved. I was worried about having the miscarriage at home because they said the pain could be pretty severe. I didn’t want the boys to see me like that. I was also worried because I didn’t want to see the baby, and I didn’t want him to go down the toilet, but I also didn’t want him disposed of in some lab. Everything went ok. The pain was pretty strong for a while, without the rests you get when you are having strong contractions in labor. And I didn’t see the baby at all, so that was good, too. I don’t even think the boys noticed anything. They were playing Nintendo (well, Nicholas napped) while Jef & I read in our room.
I’m sore today, but that is ok.
So, now I will schedule an appointment for a week from now. They’ll check to make sure the pregnant hormones are going down or are back to normal.
That’s my update. Thanks for all the prayers.

Well, we went in for a second ultrasound this morning. I wanted to be absolutely sure, you know? Teresa the technician said there wasn’t any change. Still no heartbeat, still only developed only to 7 weeks. 🙁
So that is that. Monday I have a D&C scheduled at 11 a.m. If I miscarry before then, that’s fine. The midwife said some women’s bodies just don’t let go. So I will keep you posted.
Tina & Kamali have been wonderful – Tina’s done my laundry & the dishes! (Kamali helped too) And they’ve let me come over and crash at their house. The kids like that because they can play outside. Although they know about the baby dying, I don’t really want them to focus on it. It is nice to go to Tina & Kamali’s because they have cable, so I can zone. I’m still trying to wrap my head around all this.
Gonna go hang out with the kids now. Jef took today off from work again. Thank God we have the extra money & he keeps getting computer jobs to cover days like today.
God is good. He is comforting us and we know He’s in charge. 🙂
Thanks for the prayers. Please don’t stop.

We have bad news. I went on Wednesday for my usual pregnancy PAP smear. The midwife couldn’t find the baby’s heartbeat, so she had me go in for an ultrasound (right then) to “put our minds at ease”. The ultrasound showed the baby hadn’t developed past 7 weeks (he should have been 11) and the technician could not detect a heartbeat.
Tomorrow I go in for another ultrasound just to be totally sure.
Monday, unless I miscarry naturally, I will go in for a D&C.
Thanks for all the prayers. Please keep them up. We are very sad.